Let me start off by saying that not all academics are complete social misfits or major A-holes. Now let me say that of the eight associate deans I quietly mocked this afternoon, maybe 2 were worth a top-shelf bourbon (and one of those two spoke only during the introductions).
It was an awfully awkward and uncomfortable meeting. I've mentioned, perhaps in passing, that the college is going through a reorganization. We've been mandated to shift our mission from an academic unit to a service unit. There are all sorts of issues surrounding and embedded in that loaded mandate. That's not what I want to write about today.
The eight or so associate deans and guests, representing the other colleges, schools, and departments within the university, were invited in to do a bit of brainstorming. Basically, they were asked to tell us (University College) what they could imagine us doing to support them in the future. Upon the question being asked, I immediately realized why one of our own associate deans opted not to attend.
The responses from our learned and talkative guests ranged from "Nothing, thank you. We don't deal with part-time students. And oh, by the way, have you heard that there's a journalism school on campus?" to "Well, if you could do a little web development and media placement for us, that would be great."
For my money (and my sense of business, which I think is relatively attuned), the meeting was a complete waste of everyone's time. These people, many of whom can't stand each other, did not want to be in that meeting any more than our associate dean who found a reason to beg off. It was a meeting equivalent to Apple inviting Microsoft in to ask how the next Mac desktop could be improved. These people (all smart in their own rights), haven't a clue about continuing education or distance education or adult learning. Sure, they've read the papers and talked the talk, but they don't get it - not one bit. And yet, in all fairness, why should they get it? Most of them are sitting on fat endowments and turning away more students than they can accept. They all rely heavily on subsidized services from the University, where even under RCM they are making out OK. So when you pose a ridiculous question like, "What do you see UC doing for you?" to a group of people who love to hear themselves talk about nothing in particular, your going to get some pretty ridiculous answers.
The one answer that made the most sense - almost - came from an associate dean from our grand school of management. As someone who has spent a lot of time in a professional school, he had enough sense to challenge us to make him want to "do business" with his school. "Show me why I should come to you to do something we're already doing fairly well?" He had me thinking he was pretty sharp until he suggested that UC might be best suited to help out with event planning and marketing. He completely blew it when he starting blathering about economies of scale and competitive markets. "Yeah thanks. Did you mention that you were with the school of management? Where is that on campus exactly?" (Inside joke: If you know where UC is located on the SU campus, you'll get it).
Here's the rub: This is a great time to be part of UC because it's a challenging time -- a time to reinvent the "business" to be sustainable and viable in a budgetary system that takes accountability to task. People are worried about their jobs, and maybe they should be. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't.
But I'm also worried about the student populations we serve. The part-time students - working moms, out of work retreds, struggling young parents, people wanting to get a piece of the dream - are going to be the losers here. If the university decides it doesn't want to be in that business, then that's a decision it must live with. But for God's sake, will someone take the initiative or at least have the common sense to not ask the morons I had to listen to this afternoon make that decision?
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